Filmcitatsspel

- Fucking... What the fuck. Who the fuck fucked this fucking... How did you two fucking fucks... Fuck!
- Well, that certainly illustrates the diversity of the word.

Jeannie, American Angel: Where are you staying?
Colin: I don't actually know. I guess I'll just check in to a motel, as they do in the movies.
Stacey, American Dreamgirl: Oh my God, Oh my God, that is soo cute.
Carol-Anne, American Goddess: No no no, listen! This may be a bit pushy since we just met you but... Why don't you come back and sleep at our place?
Jeannie, American Angel, Stacey, American Dreamgirl: Yeah!
Colin: Ah, well, I mean, if it's not to much of an inconvenience...
Jeannie, American Angel: Hell no! But there is one problem...
Colin: What?
Carol-Anne, American Goddess: Well, were not the richest of girls, so, we just have a little bed, and no couch. So you have to share with all three of us.
Jeannie, American Angel: And on this cold cold night.. it is going to be crowded and sweaty and stuff.
Stacey, American Dreamgirl: And we can't even afford pyjamas.
Colin: No?
Stacey, American Dreamgirl: [Shakes her head]
Carol-Anne, American Goddess: Which means.... we would be naked.
Colin: [Swallows hard, grips his beer bottle even harder] No, no, I think it will be fine.
Jeannie, American Angel, Stacey, American Dreamgirl, Carol-Anne, American Goddess: Great! [Giggles]
Jeannie, American Angel: The thing that will make it even more crowded... Harriet! You haven't met Harriet!
Colin: There is a fourth one?
Jeannie, American Angel, Stacey, American Dreamgirl, Carol-Anne, American Goddess: Yeah!
Stacey, American Dreamgirl: Don't worry, you are totally gonna like her, cuz she is the "sexy one".
Colin: Really? Wow! Praise the Lord!
Carol-Anne, American Goddess: And he is a Christian!
Jeannie, American Angel, Stacey, American Dreamgirl, Carol-Anne, American Goddess and Colin: [Giggles] Cheers!

Colin: I am Colin. God of Sex. I'm just on the wrong continent, that's all.

Colin: Exciting news!
Tony: What?
Colin: I've bought a ticket to the States. I'm off in three weeks.
Tony: No!
Colin: Yes! To a fantastic place called Wisconsin.
Tony: No!
Colin: Yes! Wisconsin babes, here comes Sir Colin! Whoo hoo!
Tony: No, Col! There are a few babes in America, I grant you, but they're already going out with rich, attractive guys.
Colin: Nah, Tone, you're just jealous. You know perfectly well that any bar anywhere in America contains ten girls more beautiful and more likely to have sex with me than the whole of the United Kingdom.
Tony: That is total bollocks. You've actually gone mad, now.
Colin: No, I'm wise. Stateside I am Prince William without the weird family.
Tony: No, Colin, no!
Colin: Yes!
Tony: Nyet!
Colin: Da!
Tony: Nein!
Colin: Ja, darling!

Kathy: Who here wants to be an advertising executive?
[several hands go up]
Emory Leeson: Who here wants to be a fire truck?
[everyone raises their hands, with several standing and commenting things like "Ooh, I do!" and "Me! Pick me!"]

Ad: The French can be annoying, come to Greece, we are much nicer.

Robles: Porsche. It's a little too small to get laid IN it, but you get laid the minute you get out of it!

Nut 1: [Driving a Mercedes] Did you know that with the top of the line German cars if you accidentally kill people, Germany pays for it?
Nut 2: That's good!

Steve: [Reads from Cardboard] Buy Volvos. They're boxy but they're good. We know they're not sexy. This is not a smart time to be sexy anyway, with so many new diseases around. Be safe instead of sexy. Volvo - Boxy, but good. Are you crazy? Are you out of your fucking mind?
Emory: Hey! I thought this would appeal to a no-nonsense-type-consumer.
Steve: Who the hell ever heard of advertising that a car as boxy? Hm? Who?
Emory: They are boxy. They are boxy! An intelligent buyer knows that. Hey, let's not fool the public any more... Let's not lie Steve! Let's level... with America!
Steve: We can't level you crazy bastard, we're in advertising!

/.../

Steve: [Reads from cardboard] Forget France. The French can be annoying. Come to Greece. We're Nicer.... We're Nicer?
Emory: So?
Steve: We're Nicer!?
Emory: The French pride themselves on being annoying. In Paris they have contests, I mean, they're eligable for huge prices.

/.../

Steve: This is truly crazy. [Reads from cardboard]: Jaguar, sleek and smart. For men who'd like hand jobs from beautiful women they hardly know!?
Emory: That's what all of these ads really mean! Men buy theese cars because of it, so why don't we just come out and say it! Hey, we know what you want! Here it is! This! [gestures steering a car with his hands] ... is for that! [points at his zipper].

/.../

Steve: [Reads from cardboard] Your fear of flying may be valid. There are always plenty of plane chrashes and people die like crazy. But you should also know that more people arrive at their destinations on our flights than on many others. So if you have to fly, fly us. United. Most of our passengers get there alive.

/../

Charles Drucker: You are so fired it is unbelivable.

"You're in a desert, walking along in the sand when all of a sudden you look down..."
"What one?"
"What?"
"What desert?"
"It doesn't make any difference what desert, it's completely hypothetical."